I’m pretty sure I mentioned before that I’m terrible at doing nothing. That I need to have a ridiculous amount of schedules and daily routines to feel settled on any given day.
I have to say this has gotten so much better with the addition of one little thing.
I am interested in how we feel it and in fact, how we feel about it. Because I’m so f**king scared of pain, even though I’ve lived through all kinds of it and I live well. I’m at peace, but is it the strange sort of peace that sits on a frozen pond? Will it sink to the depths with the changing seasons?
There’s a weird phrase going around the internet at the moment – ‘main character energy’ – or something like that. When you look into it, it’s basically a bunch of girls framing their somewhat ordinary lives as an urban romance.
I’ve spoken about therapy before here and hello – I’m about to again. I freaking LOVE what I got from therapy. All I needed was some reframing of my mindset and it felt like life wasn’t actually so bad. That I didn’t need to be weighed down by my past and my own doubts. Those are all feelings that I can control.
So now I’m realising that my experience as a human being is not necessarily determined by me, and it makes me upset. I like to have control, we all do, but this is uncontrollable. This is the course of history. This is the progression of humanity.
Have you ever come across a concept or a thought, in like a movie or a novel, that stays with you far longer than the plot or the characters? It’s been about 5 years since I read The Witch of Portobello and while I couldn’t recount it save for the major plot points, there is a concept I came across in the novel that I can’t stop thinking about.
This week we’re going to discuss my biggest takeaways from my short time in therapy and what kind of therapy I chose to undertake and why. If you are wondering whether it’s worth your while at all, this should give you some idea.